Friday, July 15, 2016

Gratitude and some soul searching

I have just watched the movie "Julie and Julia" for probably the fifth or sixth time. I do enjoy this movie and the characters are so well played by Meryl Streep and Amy Adams - if you haven't seen it make the effort, it is a "feel good" movie.

As I watched Julie writing her blog, it occurred to me how irregular I have been in my own blog writing. When I first began this blog I went from 29 posts in 2010, to 95 posts in 2012, to only 12 posts in 2014. So far this year I have done 13, certainly an improvement on 2014. I ask myself what happened with my regularity?

I can account for some drop in posts. In 2012 I didn't write tutorials. In 2014 I started writing tutorials.

Writing tutorials takes a great deal of time. Every step for making the beaded item needs to be illustrated, along with the instructions being concisely worded for ease of understanding. It can take a whole week to complete a tutorial. The tutorial for 'Ananas' pictured alongside took me 46 hours to illustrate and write. That is a weeks work for some. And to think I have done all that work and not been paid - at least not been paid yet!!

So writing tutorials takes you away from beading/designing and accounts for some of the drop in my blog postings.

What else has contributed to fewer postings? I look at all the posts in 2012 and notice I was sharing all the items I made as well as sharing the "works in progress".

I no longer share my W.I.P. and the reason being - I was copied ! - before I even had a chance to write the tutorial. That tends to put a sour taste in my mouth and has made me a lot more guarded as to what I share these days. So now I make a design, write a tutorial, then share what I have made - the spontaneity has been taken out of my passion!!  and the passion has been taken out of my spontaneity!!
I am sad this has happened.

I started beading with the idea that maybe I could earn a few extra dollars to subsidise my retirement. I didn't know I would be okay at it, I didn't know I would write instructions for creating my designs and I didn't know these instructions would be sold around the world. I also didn't know I would be in demand to travel and teach.

All these things contribute to a new career for me, one I never expected to be living.….at this late age!!
I know, I know, you are only as old as you feel. I don't feel old, I still feel spritely and have a good outlook on life. I am now approaching 66, an age I expected to be slowing down, an age for pottering around the garden and maintaining my home. Two things that have sadly been neglected for a couple of years.

I have worked for 49 years - that is a lot of working!!

Don't get me wrong, I am not complaining. I love beading, I love getting up each morning and I love sitting in the quiet and playing with beads. My love of beading will never change. The dilemma I am facing is "Do I want a new career?" "Do I want my life to speed up when I expected to be slowing down?"

So now that I have poured out my thoughts, I am asking what is the point of this post?

I am wanting to share with those aspiring designers/teachers out there in cyberland that there is a LOT of things to come up against, to learn, to process through, to decide, to consider, to define and a lot more work than I ever expected. Some of it is fantastic, some of it is exhausting and time consuming.

I guess I am trying to communicate that when you fall in love with something that you are passionate about, the Universe supports passion!  I honestly can affirm this. My passion has been supported every step of the way and has brought me to this stage in my life….and a pretty good stage to be in!!

I am most grateful for this journey. I feel the next steps are just beginning. But!! where do I want them to go? How do I want them to be?  Faster or Slower??

Only time will tell.

7 comments:

  1. thank you for sharing your thoughts .. I have and continue to wish you every success.

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  2. My opinion...pursue your passion as long as your intuition tells you to do so. At some point your priorities may change, not necessarily by choice, maybe by circumstance (health etc). So carry on sharing your bright light with the universe. A fan in Toronto, Ontario, Canada!

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  3. Oh Patrick, right there with you in every way! Hugs!!!

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  4. Thank you for sharing your contemplation...all will be revealed. Best Wishes for your continued success.
    -Eva Maria

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  5. Thank you so much for these thoughts. You are helping us all, from the beginner to the professional & everyone in between. <3

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  6. I am always late to the picnic but here goes. I have enjoyed making your Rosette pendant from Bead and Button. What talent you have and how lucky are we to have you as a resource. The ladies in my beading group were all saying how amazing it is. Thanks. Jill

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    1. Hello Jill
      thank you very much for your comments. It is always nice to receive notes like this as it inspires me and keeps me beading.

      Patrick

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