I have been very busy fulfilling beading commitments and lately I have not had a lot of time to sit and play with beads. Since these commitments have been slowly fulfilled and taken off the 'to do' list
I now sit at my bead mat, look at all the abandoned sample pieces and ask myself
"what would I like to make now?"
I wouldn't have a clue !!!
I have sat there, I have sat there and I have sat there.
I have taken samples, pulled them apart and put the beads away, just to give myself something to do.
I have opened drawers of finished items and looked at them - asking myself "how the hell did I make this one?" "Do I want to make another?" Nah - that was then this is now!!
I have been in this space before - no design ideas flowing. Not knowing what to make, not liking what I do attempt to make, wanting a new direction, not knowing what that direction is.
I occupy my time, putting new beads away, tidying up my bead table - all in the hope something will trigger an idea.
The longer I am in this space the more it begins to affect my mood. I find I become short tempered, irritable, the cat gets yelled at - even though the cat is the cat and doesn't change from one day to the next!!!
It is me and I am disgruntled, I lose patience with other things, and I just begin to feel, lost, directionless, not very fulfilled. I worry that maybe my design mojo will not return.
Heaven forbid !!!
Who would have thought that beading governs so much of my everyday life?
Is it the beading that governs?? or is it that small part of my day whereby I shut out the rest of life and immerse myself in "the NOW" - like the buddhists say we should do each day - meditate.
When I bead I am totally focussed on what is in my hand, what I am creating - immersed in the NOW.
Am I missing the beading, the making of something new, or am I missing that time whereby
I live in the moment?
To me it is a combination of both. A combination of time out (from life) to play (and create).
That is what I am missing, causing me to feel unfulfilled.
BUT - there is good news!
Whenever I have been in this space before - and there have been a few times - when my mojo is ready to flow again, generally new passion is forthcoming.
I am looking forward to it so in the meantime, I deconstruct and tidy, making ready for the Mojo!
I understand what u feel ...almost same here ..I'm focusing on my website now and I have no time beading for 2 weeks now...but I'm not struggled ...I miss beading but need to keep calm and relaxing and of course I'm Google -ing and try to find a new inspiration ...watching another beaders' creations ...and I'm pleased . I know when I'll be back to my beading mat ...I can do kind of nicer or more different like I did last time (Patricia)...so I never give up just sometime need to clear my mind and waiting for a new energy ...;)
ReplyDeleteThanks for your comment Janos, we just have to get on with other things until it returns. Try googling Bollywood jewellery, there is bound to be inspiration in there.
DeletePatrick
I get you .. I know and you know your mojo will come back .. it's just a matter of time and every creative spark needs time to refuel occasionally.
ReplyDeleteHi Patrick I can really relate. Sometimes. Feel like a dog chasing my tail. I look at beads put them together with their beads thinking this would work well together. Put them in a bag. When I pick up the bag again I can't remember what I wanted to do. I guess the passion has to just hit you and once it's starts you can't stop creating. I love those zen moments when hrs go by and I realize I've been so happy living in the moment just beading away. Aaaahhhhhh but getting to that point again. Sometimes it's days or weeks before it strikes again. Ps I love your work so much. You are an amazing artist. Thank you so much for all your beautiful and inspiring work. You up the level of everyone's beading game.
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ReplyDeleteOf course you will find your way back. When I get stuck and have time I organize first- clean up my space, put things where they can be easily found and sometimes find that bead I bought long ago not knowing what I was going to make. I will suggest that you work on basics, i.e. strap designs and clasps. These are hard, but enjoyable, work for me. They are what makes the whole but they are not nearly as inspired as the main attraction. I horde ideas for these things so that when I do create I can add just the right polish.
ReplyDeleteOr, you could watch the TV, read a book, go out for coffee, garden... do something to escape and relax that is very different.